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Untranslatable from russian.
Offered by Vlad Berditchevskiy, 2:2426/3190.26 |
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Let's take the binocular, tweezers, and a small box. Come to an elephant and look at him in the turned binocular. Using tweezers, pick up the elephant and
put it into the box. Then go to the cage, place the box into the cage and look at the elephant in the unturned binocular. That's is.
P.S. This method could be applied for crocodile hunting. Offered by Teimuraz Abashidze, tga@geocell.com.ge |
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Let's catch 6 elephants and free 5 of them.
Offered by Teimuraz Abashidze, tga@geocell.com.ge |
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Let's cut the desert from the earth's crust by the perimeter and raise one side, putting the cage to the opposite low side. The elephant due to the law of
gravity will fall into the cage. It should be remarked that the number of elephants could be much more then one. Offered by Igor Pozdeev, pgar@chat.ru |
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Let's take the desert out of the earth's crust by activating the direct oriented explosives. The blast forse should give the body (i.e. the desert) the first
space velocity. Elephant is the earth animal, and it would not like to become a satellite, so it will jump off the desert right into cage (the cage should be
placed with the door upward).
Notes:
Offered by Igor Pozdeev, pgar@chat.ru |
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Take the veneer, the hammer and go to Africa, where you should wait for an elephant in the ambush. As soon as it approaches, go out and show yourself
to the elephant. When it rushes to you, put the veneer in front of you like a shield. When the elephant's tusks stick in the veneer, bend them down with the
hammer. The elephant is all yours!
Offered by Yuri Varivoda, varivoda@lotus.vniigaz.gazprom.ru |
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Let's take something of grey colour, put it into the cage, and say to the customers that is the elephant.
Offered by Vitaly Cooperman, vita@camtek.co.il |
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Let's bring two grown-up elephants of different sexes into the cage and leave them alone for some time. The result will be the third (needed) elephant in
the cage
Offered by Sergey V.Ushakov, stl_serg@chat.ru |
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It is enough to project an elephant onto the sheet of paper, and then roll it up. You can even crumple it, and the elephant will not show any resistance.
Offered by Igor Shaposhnik, igor@stealthcomp.com |
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Take the rabbit, and beat it, until it says it is an elephant.
Offered by Sergejs Roze, Sergejs_Roze@swh-t.lv |
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Untranslatable from russian.
Offered by Denis Khlebnikov. |
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Elephants are used to the desert. Upon the decrease in area of the desert to
the dimensions of the elephant, it is not difficult to find the elephant.
Offered by Eugene A. Kuznetsov smith@lab.sun.mcst.ru |
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A primitive method, but very long and unreliable. We take a cage and place
it in the middle of the Sahara. We put inside the cage some blue-green
algae. After "n" billion years, the result of the natural course of
evolution is an elephant. If the desert still exists at this point, then the
elephant is from the desert.
Offered by Eugene A. Kuznetsov smith@lab.sun.mcst.ru |
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Every elephant receives a lottery ticket. The prize is redeemable from the
clerk in the cage. The winning elephant enters the cage, the cage is closed.
Now all that remains is to remove the clerk from the cage.
Offered by Eugene A. Kuznetsov smith@lab.sun.mcst.ru |
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Development of the elephant-trap idea. We put a broken elephant-trap in the
desert. There will always be some elephant that will find a way to get
captured in even a broken elephant-trap.
Offered by Eugene A. Kuznetsov smith@lab.sun.mcst.ru |
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"Well..who's going to make it to the cage faster?"
Offered by Eugene A. Kuznetsov smith@lab.sun.mcst.ru |
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Build a cage around the whole desert. The problem is solved upon completion
of fence.
Offered by Eugene A. Kuznetsov smith@lab.sun.mcst.ru |
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We announce in the Sahara that in this season everything plaid is in style
(note: this is a pun. In russian the word plaid stems from the word cage).
As a result, at least one female elephant will appear in the cage.
Offered by Silanty Kr-skoj silanty@dux.ru |
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We make a note in the book for keeping track of caught elephants. If after
this there are still doubters, we show them a completed Certificate of
Caught Elephant with a stamp from the Sahara Bureau of Elephant Hunting and
receipts regarding the payment of hunters and commanders with all necessary
signatures.
Offered by Silanty Kr-skoj silanty@dux.ru |
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We build a retirement home for elderly elephants. It is not difficult to get
an elderly elephant from the home into a cage. Upon getting the elephant into
the cage one must make sure that the elephant doesn't die from old age.
Offered by Eugene A. Kuznetsov smith@lab.sun.mcst.ru |
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Catch a mammoth (this problem has been solved in the past). Shave it bald.
Offered by Silanty Kr-skoj silanty@dux.ru |
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It is obvious that elephants have resided in the Sahara in the past. We
locate and dig up remains of the old elephants and build a cage around them.
Offered by Silanty Kr-skoj silanty@dux.ru |
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Place a TV in the Sahara and televise a melodrama about elephants. If too
many elephants show up, we scare the extra ones off by broadcasting weather
reports.
Offered by Silanty Kr-skoj silanty@dux.ru |
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This is a great method, based on using a bait. It is well known that
elephants have red eyes because this helps them camouflage in tomato gardens. The method is
trivial: buy a truckload of tomatoes, put them in a cage. The elephant immediately
runs to the cage to hide in the tomato camouflage. We close the cage. The only problem
is finding the elephant amongst the tomatoes.
Offered by revil@sgb.ru |
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On the elephant path to the water hole, we place on both sides equidistant,
two stacks of hay. Elephants passing by will stop in their indecisiveness
and will stay indefinitely. At this point it is simple to take the elephant
with your bare hands (i.e., a tractor) or simply build a cage arond the
standing elephant.
Offered by Silanty Kr-skoj silanty@dux.ru |
